Where Bigger Than the Game Happens

My lack of caring about the NBA is well documented. I'm just not a fan. The league doesn’t produce interesting or compelling basketball. This is the reason I prefer college, or even high school, hoops. Not that I am a huge fan of those either, but I enjoy the occasional basketball game from time to time.

With that said, I may actually watch the NBA Finals under one circumstance: Los Angeles Lakers vs. Cleveland Cavaliers.

Now, I wouldn't watch every game, or even really care who wins (although I do prefer Lebron over Kobe), but I might watch with relative interest. It could potentially be one of those epic matchups in sports history. Or it could be a complete dud. Luckily, though, the NBA is completely rigged so we're guaranteed to find out.

Can't you just see David Stern dressed up as, let’s say, the Hamburglar, running up to Kevin Garnett, and smacking him in the knee with a lead pipe, all while laughing hysterically and screaming "it's Lebron's turn bitch, you're old news!"? Because I certainly can. If we have learned anything over the years of “random” ping pong balls on draft lottery day, and referee scandals, it is that David Stern is a maniac who has complete control over everything in the NBA. Things always go his way, because he makes sure they do.

The three man veteran show of the Boston Celtics was the compelling story last year, but now there is only one thing anybody cares about: Kobe vs Lebron. With all due respect to Chris Paul, Dwayne Wade, and the unbelievably ripped Dwight Howard, nobody outside of your respective cities actually wants to watch you succeed. You just aren't interesting.

The reason for this is fairly simple: The NBA is built around players rather than teams.

Which, might I add, is completely the NBA marketing department’s fault. Pimping players instead of teams is just how the NBA has always done things. Players are bigger than the team, and the biggest players are even bigger than the game. This just isn’t the case in other sports.

Take for example Alex Rodriguez and Tom Brady, arguably the biggest stars of their respective sports. Each was injured at the beginning of the season, and either missed the whole year (Brady) or has yet to come back (Arod). Yet, nobody even bats an eyelash. Sure their ailments created fodder for awhile, but their time off never deterred fans from watching baseball or football, or following their favorite team.

Now just imagine if Kobe or Lebron tore an ACL. See you later. Bandwagon is empty. Maybe less so in the Lakers case, but people would abandon the Cavs faster than Benny “the Jet” Rodriguez stealing home. And, furthermore, the NBA’s ratings and attendance as a whole would take a hit. People tune into watch the stars, not the teams.

I am definitely the same way. I couldn’t possibly care less about any professional basketball team, but I do find the Kobe vs. Lebron matchup at least marginally compelling. And, quite frankly, I would rather watch Kobe and Lebron play one on one and just go without the rest of the players on the court (no offense to D.J. Mbenga or Sasha Pavlovic).

Pimping stars is just the way NBA works. Luckily that means an all but guaranteed collision course for the Lakers and Cavs in the finals. David Stern will see to it.

Maybe though, for the sake of full disclosure, he should change the NBA slogan to “where bigger than the game happens.”

-Juice